SCHOOL - 1950s v 2014

[Wizzo]

Scenario :
Johnny and Mark get into a fight after school.

1950s - Crowd gathers. Mark wins. Johnny and Mark shake hands and end up best friends.

2014 - Police called, and they arrest Johnny and Mark & charge them with assault.
Both expelled even though Johnny started it.
Both children go to anger management programs for 3 months.
School governors hold meeting to implement bullying prevention programs.

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Scenario :
Robbie won't be still in class, disrupts other students.

1950s - Robbie sent to the office and given six of the best by the Principal.
Returns to class, sits still and does not disrupt class again.

2014 - Robbie given huge doses of Ritalin. Becomes a zombie. Tested for ADHD – result deemed to be positive. Robbie's parents get fortnightly disability payments and school gets extra funding from government because Robbie has a disability.

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Scenario :
Billy breaks a window in his neighbour's car and his Dad gives him a whipping with his belt.

1950s - Billy is more careful next time, grows up normal, goes to college, and becomes a successful businessman.

2014 - Billy's dad is arrested for child abuse. Billy removed to foster care; joins a gang; ends up in jail.

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Scenario :
Mark gets a headache and takes some Aspirin to school.

1950s - Mark gets glass of water from Principal to take aspirin with, Passes exams & becomes a solicitor.

2014 - Police called, car searched for drugs and weapons.
Mark expelled from school for drug taking. Ends up as a drop out.

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Scenario :
Johnny takes apart leftover fireworks from Guy Fawkes night, puts them in a paint tin & blows up a wasp's nest.

1950s - Wasps die.

2014- Police & Anti-Terrorism Squad called. Johnny charged with domestic terrorism, investigate parents, siblings removed from home, computers confiscated.
Johnny's Dad goes on a terror watch list and is never allowed to fly in an aeroplane again.

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Scenario :
Johnny falls over while playing football during morning break and scrapes his knee.
He is found crying by his teacher, Mary.  She hugs him to comfort him.

1950s - In a short time, Johnny feels better and goes on playing football. No damage done.

2014 - Mary is accused of being a sexual predator and loses her job. She faces 3 years in prison.
Johnny undergoes 5 years of therapy and ends up gay.

[cosworth151]

Sadly true, Wizzo.

PBS recently ran a new Ken Burns documentary on the Roosevelts. It stated that if Teddy were a school boy today, he would probably be prescribed Ritalin and grow up to be a file clerk that nobody ever heard of.

[Scott]

Amazing the changes, even in the 60's when I grew up was a much more sensible time...though I only take issue with the last sentence.  People are born gay, they don't turn out that way.

[Ian]

So very true Wiz, having started school in the 50's I can guarantee it IS true.

[John S]

 


9 out of 10 comedy value Wizzo.    but only 1 out of 6 for accuracy. 

Be nice if either the old time scenarios or the modern equivalents were true.  However my memory of school in the fifties and sixties runs a little counter to the statements in the joke; as does the modern equivalent courtesy of current school kids in the family.