GPWizard F1 Forum

Fun Stuff => Pictures & Jokes => Topic started by: Neil.P on December 25, 2009, 09:20:11 PM

Title: It's Cracker time
Post by: Neil.P on December 25, 2009, 09:20:11 PM

Why did the lady throw her clock out of the window? :DntKnw:

She wanted to see time fly! :DD

Title: Re: It's Cracker time
Post by: Neil.P on December 25, 2009, 09:22:04 PM

What do you get when you cross 2 banana peels? :DntKnw:

A pair of slippers! :DD

Neil.P

Title: Re: It's Cracker time
Post by: Ian on December 26, 2009, 11:18:03 AM

What do you give an ill pig


Oinkment

Title: Re: It's Cracker time
Post by: david1275 on December 26, 2009, 11:41:24 AM

How long do a reindeers legs have to be?
Long enough to touch the ground!

Title: Re: It's Cracker time
Post by: david1275 on December 26, 2009, 11:43:18 AM

What is the best xmas present in the world?

A broken drum, you just can't beat it!

Title: Re: It's Cracker time
Post by: david1275 on December 26, 2009, 11:48:24 AM

Did you know that Santa's not allowed to go down chimneys this year? It was declared unsafe by the Elf and Safety Commission.

Title: Re: It's Cracker time
Post by: Neil.P on December 26, 2009, 12:28:09 PM

What do you call a sleeping bull? :DntKnw:

A bulldozer! :DD

Neil.P

Title: Re: It's Cracker time
Post by: Slugger on December 26, 2009, 02:25:29 PM

Quote from: Neil.P on December 26, 2009, 12:28:09 PM

What do you call a sleeping bull? :DntKnw:

A bulldozer! :DD

Neil.P

We had that one :DD

Title: Re: It's Cracker time
Post by: cosworth151 on December 26, 2009, 04:37:33 PM

What does a grammar teacher call Santa's elves?

Subordinate Clauses.

Title: Re: It's Cracker time
Post by: Wizzo on December 26, 2009, 07:04:42 PM

Personally I don't find cracker jokes amusing.  ::)

Title: Re: It's Cracker time
Post by: Ian on December 26, 2009, 07:49:12 PM

They are only meant to make you groan.  :tease:

Title: Re: It's Cracker time
Post by: John S on December 27, 2009, 02:59:40 PM

Quote from: Wizzo on December 26, 2009, 07:04:42 PM

Personally I don't find cracker jokes amusing.  ::)

I'm really Flabbergasted about that Wizzo  :o     

- Ah, but now I can see that as you suffer so very much you have to save them up and post them for us lot to groan at throughout the year, just to ease your pain. :crazy: :fool:   :DD :DD :DD

Title: Re: It's Cracker time
Post by: Neil.P on December 27, 2009, 03:16:08 PM

What is white and fluffy and beats its chest? :DntKnw:

A meringue-utang! :DD


Neil.P

Title: Re: It's Cracker time
Post by: Jericoke on December 28, 2009, 05:32:39 PM

Where do you find an elephant?

Depends on where you lost it.

(It was actually in French (Canadian cracker)  and I THINK that's what it said)

Title: Re: It's Cracker time
Post by: John S on December 28, 2009, 05:40:59 PM

Why don't ducks tell jokes when they are flying?   :DntKnw:



Because they would Quack up!  :D :yahoo: :yahoo:

Title: Re: It's Cracker time
Post by: Neil.P on December 28, 2009, 05:54:34 PM

What can you serve that you cannot eat? :DntKnw:

A tennis ball! :DD


Neil.P

Title: Re: It's Cracker time
Post by: cosworth151 on December 29, 2009, 12:45:03 PM

Don't start me on elephant jokes, Jeri!

How can you tell if an elephant has been in your refrigerator?

Footprints in the cheese cake.



How can you tell if there is an elephant in your bed?

The "E" monogrammed on his pajamas.

Title: Re: It's Cracker time
Post by: Jericoke on December 29, 2009, 02:56:13 PM

Quote from: cosworth151 on December 29, 2009, 12:45:03 PM

Don't start me on elephant jokes, Jeri!

Why are elephants grey?

So you don't get them confused with blueberries.

Title: Re: It's Cracker time
Post by: cosworth151 on December 29, 2009, 03:57:46 PM

Why shouldn't you walk in the jungle between 2 and 4?

That's when the elephants jump out of the trees



Why do beavers have flat tails?

They walk in the jungle between 2 and 4.

Title: Re: It's Cracker time
Post by: Jericoke on December 29, 2009, 04:22:02 PM

How do you put an elephant in a refrigerator?
Step one: Open the door.
Step two: Put the elephant in.
Step three: Close the door.

How do you put a giraffe in a refrigerator?
Step one: Open the door.
Step two: Take the elephant out.
Step three: Put the giraffe in.
Step four: Close the door.

If an elephant and a giraffe had a race, who would win?
The elephant. The giraffe is in the refrigerator.

Title: Re: It's Cracker time
Post by: cosworth151 on December 29, 2009, 04:57:25 PM

What's red and white on the outside and grey on the inside?

Campbell's Cream of Elephant soup