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Author Topic: Red Skelton's Recipe For The Perfect Marriage  (Read 832 times)

Offline Cam

Red Skelton's Recipe For The Perfect Marriage
« on: October 27, 2010, 11:46:39 AM »
1. Two times a week we go to a nice restaurant, have a
Little beverage, good food and companionship.
She goes on Tuesdays, I go on Fridays.

2. We also sleep in separate beds.
Hers is in California , and mine is in Texas .

3. I take my wife everywhere,
But she keeps finding her way back.

4. I asked my wife where she wanted to go for our anniversary.
"Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!" she said.
So I suggested the kitchen.

5. We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.

6. She has an electric blender, electric
Toaster and electric bread maker.
She said "There are too many gadgets, and no place
To sit down!" So I bought her an electric chair.

7. My wife told me the car wasn't running well
Because there was water in the carburetor.
I asked where the car was. She told me, "In the lake."

8. She got a mud pack and looked great for two days.
Then the mud fell off.

9. She ran after the garbage truck, yelling, "Am I too late
For the garbage?" The driver said, "No, jump in!".

10. Remember: Marriage is the number one cause of divorce.

11. I married Miss Right. I just didn't know her
First name was 'Always'.

12. I haven't spoken to my wife in 18 months.
I don't like to interrupt her.

13. The last fight was my fault though.
My wife asked, "What's on the TV?"
I said, "Dust!".
 





 


I am a lover of what is, not because I'm a spiritual person, but because it hurts when I argue with reality - Byron Katie

David

  • Guest
Re: Red Skelton's Recipe For The Perfect Marriage
« Reply #1 on: October 27, 2010, 06:45:47 PM »
No 8 gave me a chuckle.  :DD

Offline Canada Darrell™

Re: Red Skelton's Recipe For The Perfect Marriage
« Reply #2 on: October 28, 2010, 12:36:46 AM »
Number 9 is my pick! Good one Cam!
Kimi's back! Future double WDC.

 


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