new years resolutions

[Dare]

F1 New Year Resolutions
Monday January 08 2007

The New Year is a time when people face up to problems and resolve to try something new. PF1 has developed some New Year resolutions for the people in F1. They should try these.

Ron Dennis
Find out how to get to the podium at each grand prix. It's been so long since any Mclaren personnel have been required on the podium to receive the winner's trophy that they'll need instructions on how to get there. Then again it might not be necessary in 2007.


a little late but better late than never

Robert Kubica
Ask the engineers at BMW to design the 2007 model around him and not Nick Heidfed, that way ickle will have no way of reaching the pedals.

Kimi Raikkonen
Start learning how to love pasta and chianti and quit the rollmop herrings with a bottle of vodka chaser.

Felipe Massa
Slip Kimi Raikkonen's engineers a crate of vintage champagne (before) that all-important first race.

Christian Horner
Never ever promise to do anything involving nudity. Unless the bet is about David Coulthard winning the World Championship, because we believe that's a safe one.

Max Mosley
Also promise never ever to do anything involving nudity.

Bernie Ecclestone
Try an exciting new haircut. Only the Monza banking and the Silverstone grandstands are older than Bernie's haircut.

Nico Rosberg
Promise not to use your team-mate as a braking aid on the first lap.

Jenson Button
Go out, trim the beard. And never ever ever return with it. That's ever.

Lewis Hamilton
Don't answer any questions which include the phrase "...first black driver".

Rubens Barrichello
Start asking about DTM contracts in 2008 before Coulthard gets in first.

Charlie Whiting (FIA Race Starter)
Try doing it with your eyes open and see if it's any better.

Williams
Smile, it can't get any worse.

Fernando Alonso
Start taking choreography lessons - because the dance on top of the Renault we saw last season was way up there with David Brent's from 'The Office'. (Rhymes with Pit)

Ant Davidson
Don't get into a fist fight with anyone except Takuma Sato

Juan Montoya
If you're lucky you'll have 10 years at the top in NASCAR. If you're unlucky, you might have 20.

Jean Todt
Relax, you are STILL the most important person in Michael's life after his family, he STILL has the framed photo of you in his office, yes he WILL be on-line during grands prix, yes he WILL come and visit Maranello, and GO to the restaurant with you, and he promises NOT to flirt with any other motor manufacturer, promise, cross his heart etc etc.

Hermann Tilke (FI's official circuit designer)
If you're designing a new circuit for India, let's have a 360 degrees loop like in Hot Wheels.

Flavio Briatore
Learn to speak English and be understood - maybe using Mark Blundell's Talk English Proper available from Amazon.com.

[davewilson]

Dare:
This has got to be the best input to a Forum I have ever seen!
I dont know how you do it?
But Keep it up:
The Stig